Twice Shy
by MizJoely
Summary: Followup to Kiss of the Vampire, In Which David and Ace return and are reunited with The Doctor and Tegan. A little break between supernatural upheavals.
1. Prologue

"Once bitten, twice shy." - Old saying. Old, old saying. Really old. No idea who said it first.

**Prologue**

David and Ace looked at each other as the TARDIS doors closed behind the Doctor and Tegan. "Now what?" David asked, lounging casually against the wall. "I don't know about you, but I'm not tired." And he wasn't, either; in spite of the fact that it had been a good 18 hours or more since he'd last slept. Since any of them had. The adrenaline was still flowing from their recent Transylvanian mission to rescue a kidnapped Tegan Jovanka, former traveling companion of the Doctor. "Want to do anything in particular?"

Ace glanced at him sidelong, catching her lower lip between her teeth and smiling. "What do you suggest?" she asked, leaning back against the console with her elbows. "Ever since we got away from Transylvania, you've looked like you've had something on your mind." She looked down, then back up again, the smile still hovering on her lips. "Give!"

David walked with feigned nonchalance to stand by her side, facing the console and plopping his own elbows down next to hers. "I was just wondering what you do for fun. Save the universe?"

"Nah, that's work," Ace replied, turning her head so that she was looking directly at him, their faces only inches apart. Her lips curved in another small smile. "It's just been me and the Professor for a long time. There hasn't been much time for...fun."

If that wasn't an answer to his unspoken question, David thought, nothing was. He took a deep breath and leaned closer. If he was wrong, she was probably going to punch him right in the nose. But if he was right...

Their lips met hesitantly, and Ace was definitely not pushing him away. David noted this with a feeling of relief, then closed his eyes and concentrated on the kiss.

They should have known. Especially with David's track record. Maneuvering his body closer to hers, reaching for her arm, his hand skidded on the console...and activated the Time Rotor. "Oh no! Not again!" he yelled in dismay as they dematerialized.


	2. Reunion

"Look, I said I was sorry." David had a distinct feeling of deja vu as the TARDIS re-materialized, a few frantic minutes later. "I should've known better than to get that close to the console. But it was your fault too."

Ace glared at him, then sighed in reluctant agreement. "I suppose so. At least we got back. It's a good thing the Professor put in that recall button!" She patted the now-quiescent console gingerly, keeping her hands well away from any buttons, levers, or other gadgets. "Let's just go to the house and explain."

"But the Doctor told us to wait here," David objected from his position near the interior door of the TARDIS. He'd moved there the minute he realized what he'd done, wisely letting Ace be the one to push the recall button. He was beginning to think he was jinxed. He and Ace were left alone in the TARDIS for five minutes, and what happened? David messed up the controls. Again. After everything that had happened to them, after escaping a vampire and witch, after bringing Tegan and her baby to safety, how could he be so stupid?

The Doctor had brought them to London. Not wanting to disturb his doctor friend, Harry Sullivan, at such an ungodly hour of the morning with too many people, the Doctor had asked Ace and David to stay on the TARDIS at least until full daylight. The rest, as the saying went, was history. And history, as David was beginning to understand, had an all-too-unfortunate habit of repeating itself, at least where he and the TARDIS were concerned.

"You think he didn't notice that the TARDIS disappeared?" Ace interrupted David's guilty musings. "It's too noisy to miss. No, we'd better just go inside and take our lumps."

David nodded as Ace opened the door, then trudged out after her. It was full daylight, so they'd lost some time; the sun had still been well below the horizon before their accidental trip. Par for the course, as far as David was concerned. Ace didn't seem worried, just annoyed that it had been longer than they'd thought. Also par for the course.

Aftera brief, intense conferenceDavid's word; Ace called it a rowabout which door to try, the two of them ended up trooping around to the front of the house and ringing the buzzer there. It was answered by a sleepy-eyed teenager who looked a few years younger than them. His facegray eyes, a few freckles scattered about the snub nose, wide mouth, and stubborn-looking chinwas vaguely familiar, although neither Ace nor David could say why. "Can I help you?" he asked with the polite tone people use when they suspect that they are facing someone who wants to sell them something they don't want to buy.

"Hi," David said hesitantly. "Is this the Sullivan residence?" The Doctor hadn't said anything about his friend having any kids, but then, he had other things on his mind. And there was always the possibility that they'd landed in the wrong backyard. You never knew with the TARDIS. The young man's nod laid that fear to rest, although he still looked puzzled. "Good," David said with a relieved smile. "We're supposed to meet the Doctor and Tegan here. I'm David and this is Ace."

At those words, the stranger's mouth dropped open in an expression of shocked surprise, and the two facing him involuntarily looked over their shoulders to see if perhaps something horrifying was coming up the street.

"Oi, there!" Ace piped up. "What's wrong?"

The teen continued to gape at them for a moment, then transferred his gaze from David to Ace and shook his head rapidly. "Mum!" he yelled over his shoulder, never removing his eyes from the two people in front of him. His expression had changed from shock to intense excitement. "Mum! You're never gonna believe who's here!" He reached up with one hand to brush impatiently at a swath of dark brown hair that had fallen across his eyes, which remained glued to a thoroughly confused David and Ace.

"Who is it, Jason?" came a woman's muffled voice from the interior of the house. "Who on earth could be calling at this hour of the morning?" The voice became clearer, and with the final, irritated words, the person it belonged to appeared.

It was David and Ace's turn to gape. The woman standing behind Jason was Tegan Jovanka, but a Tegan Jovanka several years older than the woman they'd left only a short time ago. Or had it been that short a time?

The suspicion that was forming in both Ace and David's minds was confirmed by Tegan's reaction. Her face blanched as she recognized them and she stumbled back a step, clutching desperately at the door as if to keep herself from collapsing. She recovered quickly, however, pushing the door further open and gesturing vaguely for them to come inside. "I suppose it was inevitable," she muttered, as if to herself, then seemed to notice that her two visitors were still hesitating on the front steps. "Come inside, you two," she snapped. "You can't stand outside there all day. The Doctor will want to see you. The Doctor..." Her eyes closed briefly, as if in pain, then she shook her head and turned, practically running up the front stairs, not bothering to see if David and Ace had actually entered the house.

Jason took care of that, tugging impatiently on David's arm, practically pulling him into the house in his excitement. Once they were fully inside, he allowed the door to slam shut behind them, causing an already jumpy David to nearly come out of his skin. "Come into the parlor," Jason urged, his words coming in an excited rush. "Wow! Dad said you'd show up, but I don't think Mum ever believed him! Where's the TARDIS? What happened, anyway?" He glanced back at David, a sly smile curving his lips. "Dad always said you probably hit another wrong button, and that he hoped to all the Gods of the Universe that Ace could get you back."

Ace rolled her eyes and plopped into the nearest chair. She glared at David. "Great going, Yank," she said sarcastically. "You know who this is, don't you?" She indicated Jason with an accusing finger.

"Yeah, I figured out he's the baby," David shot back. He pushed nervously at his hair as he sat heavily on the arm of the sofa opposite Ace. "Exactly how long have we been gone?" he demanded, turning to look at Jason.

"I turned 16 last week," Tegan's not-so-little-boy replied promptly. "Don't worry, Dad's not mad anymore. He stopped muttering your names like curse words under his breath years ago." He made an impatient motion, as if brushing David's words away. "Where's the TARDIS?" His eyes shone with eagerness.

Ace waved toward the back of the house. "Same spot it was when we dropped you folks off. Right out back."

"Great!" Without a backward glance, Jason jumped to his feet and disappeared at a dead run through the parlor door.

"It's locked!" Ace called after him, then drummed impatient fingers on the arm of her chair and looked consideringly at David from under her lashes. "You're right; it was my fault, too," she said after a long, silent moment. She stood up and moved over to sit next to him on the sofa, laying a comforting hand on his arm. "Sorry."

"I'm sorry I snapped at you too." David grinned weakly and threw his arm around Ace's shoulders. "I guess we should've moved away from the console before I tried to kiss you."

"I might have known it would be something like that," came a familiar, dry voice from behind them.

David pulled his arm away from Ace's shoulder and jumped guiltily to his feet. "Doc!" he exclaimed. Ace turned as well, leaning her arms on the back of the sofa to stare critically at her former traveling companion.

"You don't look any different," she declared. "Just the clothes."

The Doctor moved further into the room, taking the seat Ace had vacated. He was wearing a pair of comfortable-looking tweed pants, a rumpled white shirt with his trademark question marks on the lapels, and a baggy gray sweater. It was the quietest Ace had ever seen him dressed. "Sit back down, David," he told the nervous young man. "You look like you need to. And I believe we have a few things to discuss."

"Like the fact that I screwed up again and landed 16 years in my own future?" David muttered, but did as the Doctor asked and re-seated himself next to Ace.

"Well, that wasn't necessarily your fault," was the Doctor's surprising reply. He cleared his throat uncomfortably, before confessing, "Actually, it's mine. I'm afraid I was rather rushed when I installed the recall button; I had it set to send the TARDIS here in case of emergency, but I accidentally set the time coordinates to the wrong date. We're lucky it was only 16 years; it could have been worse. Much worse," he added grimly. "I ran some experiments, tried to remember exactly what I did when I programmed the recall button, and estimated that I'd thrown off the coordinates by approximately 15 years. And here you are," he added with some satisfaction.

Identical looks of relief flashed across Ace and David's faces at these words. Although it was still their own fault for activating the TARDIS in the first place, at least it wasn't their fault they came back at the wrong time. "So," Ace said after a pause, "what have you been up to with us gone so long?"

"Oh, I've managed to keep busy," the Doctor replied. "I renewed my ties with UNIT; they were more than happy to reacquire their 'unofficial scientific advisor.' It gave me something to do while I was waiting." His expression clouded. "But I'm afraid I have some rather distressing news for you, David." His voice was subdued and sympathetic. David braced himself; whatever the Doctor was about to tell him, it wasn't something he wanted to say. "David, Ithat is we, UNIT and Itried to explain what happened to you to your father, but I'm afraid he refused to so much as listen to us, much less believe what we were trying to tell him."

"You mean you tried to tell him that I was stuck in a time machine?" David asked incredulously. "My father?" He laughed, a short, humorless bark. "I wish I'd been a fly on the wall for that one!"

The Doctor scowled slightly. "It did not go well," he conceded. "He continued to insist that you had run off with, how did he put it, 'some Australian bimbo', simply to aggravate him. We gave up after a while." He paused before adding gently, "I gather your relationship with your father has been less than ideal."

"That's what I'd call a major understatement, Doc," David replied. He shook his head, still somewhat dazed by the fact that he was 16 years out of sync. Irrelevantly, Bertie Hall, his Australian girlfriend, flashed into his mind; she would be in her thirties now. He wondered if she were married, if she ever thought about him anymore. "So he probably cut me out of his will and wouldn't believe me even if I showed up on his doorstep tomorrow," David murmured. He didn't need to see the Doctor's sympathetic nod to know he was right; he knew his father too well.

The Doctor began to speak once it was clear that David had nothing further to add. "When I realized what must have happened, my first action"

"After cursing us roundly?" Ace interrupted, recalling Jason's words with an impish grin. Being out of time didn't perturb her; she'd long since severed her ties to Earth and Perivale. She felt a little bad for stranding the Professor for so longeven if it was mostly his own faultbut he seemed to have made out all right; he always landed on his feet, that one did.

The Doctor turned a stern eye on her. "Well, yes," he admitted after a moment. "But my first action after that was to make arrangements with Harry and his wife Sarah Jane to stay here. So we would be here when you showed back up again."

"What if the recall button had been set into the past, or a lot farther into the future?" Ace asked curiously.

The Doctor shrugged. "Then I'd have been an alien stranded on Eartha situation with which I am not unfamiliarat least until I could create some sort of signaling device to send for help from Gallifrey. I've been saving that as a last resort, though," he added, wincing unconsciously at the thought of how the High Council would have reacted to his losing the TARDIS. Again. "Which is a moot point, since here you are."

He studied them. David still looked shaken, but not irretrievably upset. Ace looked perfectly calm; well, she'd been out of her own time more than once in her life. They'd both adjust, he decided, although he felt a tremor of doubt for David. So much had happened to him in so short a time... He'd do well to keep an eye on that young man, and not just because he was dismayingly accident-prone on the TARDIS. Not unlike a certain UNIT physician whose house they had taken over… "Well." The two youngsters looked up expectantly. "What shall we do now, hmm?"

David shook his head. "Geez, Doc, I don't know. I mean, I was going to ask if I could stick around and travel with you some more; this kind of makes it inevitable, doesn't it? I mean, face it; my old man wouldn't believe it was me even if I showed him dental records and fingerprints and told him about the mole on his butt."

Ace bit back a snort of laughter while the Doctor nodded, careful not to let the concern he felt at David's wordsspoken lightly, but with an undertone of old pain the Time Lord didn't missshow in either his face or his voice. "I suppose so." He glanced over his shoulder toward the front hall. David's problems were purely hypothetical at this point; unfortunately, right now he had to deal with some problems he knew were all too real. "Until we have everything sorted out, Ace can have the spare bedroom, and you can bunk with Jason. You'll understand if I ask you to sleep here instead of in the TARDIS," he added dryly. David turned red to the tips of his ears, while Ace merely wrinkled her nose impudently. "Jason can show you where the kitchen and other amenities are located, once you pry him away from the TARDIS," he continued, glancing once again toward the front hall. "If you'll excuse me, I need to speak to my wife." He rose from his chair.

"Wife?" Ace and David exclaimed at the same time. It occurred to David that they had completely missed the significance of the way Jason had called Tegan "Mom" and the Doctor "Dad." He felt a trace of jealously, but sternly suppressed it. Jason deserved a mother and father that loved him, no matter how complicated those relationships might be. And he most emphatically did _not_ deserve to be envied for having those loving parents. David angrily wiped thoughts of his uncaring father out of his mind, just as he wiped thoughts of his mother and grandfather awaypeople who had loved him, only to die way, way too soon. It was getting easier, to keep his mind off them and the pain all three had caused him, in different ways; soon, he hoped, he'd be able to think about them without wanting to cry like a stupid baby.

The Doctor nodded, unfazed by their reaction. "Yes. Once we realized what had happened, and that it might be some time before you returned...well, suffice it to say that Tegan and I worked things out between us, things that have long needed airing. I trust," he added with a twinkle in his eyes, "that this meets with your approval?"

Ace's astounded expression was replaced instantly by an ear-to-ear grin. "Way to go, professor!" she exclaimed. "We were right, Davey!" She punched him gleefully in the arm while the Doctor raised an eyebrow and shook his head ruefully. It was difficult to keep things from Ace; he'd been right when he told her she was getting too perceptive for his own good.

David merely nodded and absently rubbed his arm. He still looked somewhat overwhelmed, and the Doctor hoped that was all he was feeling. "There is one other thing," he added, pausing at the foot of the front stairs. "Please don't say anything to Jason regarding the circumstances of his birth. He knows that Dracula kidnapped his mother, but he thinks she was already pregnant when it happened, I'm his father. He also knows you disappeared afterwards, but he doesn't know he was born yet. Tegan and I decided it would be best for all concerned if the true story remained our secret." He waited for their nods of agreementand Ace's cheery "Righty-oh, Professor!"before continuing up the stairs to face his wife.


	3. Upheavals at Home

David sank back into his abandoned seat, moodily gnawing on one knuckle. It wasn't fair, and he wasn't being fair if he thought the world was supposed to be fair, but nobody said he had to be reasonable all the time. And since the world had proven itself to be pretty unreasonable lately, what with witches and vampires and time-traveling aliens popping up all over the place, it seemed perfectly reasonable to be unreasonable.

There was something wrong with the logic of that argument, but David didn't feel like analyzing it just now. All he felt like doing was sitting where he was and brooding. Ace, however, had different plans. "Come on, Yank, up and at 'em," she said cheerfully, pulling at his hand. "Let's go."

David raised his eyes to hers. "Go? Go where?"

Ace glared down at him in exasperation. "Anywhere we want, mate. Outside to talk to Jason about the TARDIS, around the block, down to the shops...where do you want to go?" She wrinkled her nose. "Or do you just want to sit around here for the rest of the day?"

David shrugged, avoiding her eyes. "The world's waited for us for 16 years; I think it can wait another day."

Ace plopped down next to him, concern in her eyes. "Hey, that's not the kind of attitude I expected from you! Think of it as an adventure, that's all. The Doctor'll take care of us."

David sighed. Ace wasn't going to just let this drop, so he may as well give in. Besides, she was right. He had no right to complain if an adventure he volunteered for didn't turn out the way he expected. He turned and smiled a lopsided grin. "I guess you're right," he said, hauling himself to his feet and holding out his hand to Ace. "If I wanted my life to stay the same, I never would have tried to see Tegan in the hospital, and I definitely wouldn't have got on the TARDIS. Change is good, right?"

"Right!" Ace agreed, taking his hand and jumping up enthusiastically. "So try not to worry about things. Not right now, anyway. Let's see if there's a shop around here that sells a newspaper, shall we? And do some catching up? I'm sure Jason knows if there's one nearby."

"OK, but all I have is a little American money and Australian pounds," David said, checking his pockets as they headed for the door. "Shouldn't we tell the Doctor where we're going?"

Ace rolled her eyes, but nodded. "We'll tell Jason when we ask him where the nearest shop is. It's not like we're on a strange planet, after all; how much trouble can we get into just going to fetch a newspaper?"

David opened his mouth, then closed it without saying anything. They both already knew the answer. He could tell by the mischievous glint in Ace's eye that she'd asked the question on purpose. "All right, let's get this over with," was all David finally said. "It'll wake me up." The lack of sleep was finally catching up with him, that and all the emotional upheavals. He followed Ace out of the parlor.

>>>

Tegan didn't even look up from her place on the window seat when her husband entered their bedroom; a bad sign. Although she appeared calmer than when she'd burst into his study and rather hysterically told him his "bloody time machine" was back, his wife was obviously still upset.

"I suppose you'll be going off in that wretched machine to save the universe again," she said stiffly, not bothering to turn around. The bedroom window, the Doctor knew, gave a splendid view of the backyard. And the TARDIS. They'd never get Jason to do his chores today; so much for getting him up early to paint the back stairs.

"Now, Tegan," the Doctor began in a weary voice as he walked over to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Don't you 'now, Tegan' me," she snapped. "I've always known this day would come, that those two down there would pop back into our lives again. Jason's been praying for it ever since we told him who you were." She glared over at him, her eyes meeting his for the first time, and he recognized the fear behind her anger. "Don't think I'll be going with you this time," she said fiercely. "I've done my fair share of universe saving, and I have no intention of galloping off into outer space ever again. That sort of thing's all right for children like them, although I'd hardly call traveling with you safe"

"Tegan," the Doctor interrupted, holding his own anger firmly in check, "I hardly think flinging accusations at me is going to help. I know how you feel about traveling in the TARDIS; we've been through all this before. I promised you when we were married that I wouldn't leave, and that promise still stands. Just because Ace and David are back doesn't mean anything has changed."

Tegan returned her eyes to the window. Jason was busily crawling around the TARDIS, examining every square inch of the exterior. "Doesn't it?" she murmured. She turned abruptly away, unable to bear the sight of her son's obvious excitement. "I don't want to talk about it right now." Her voice was strained, her eyes full of fear. "I _can't_."

The Doctor nodded slowly, responding to the note of desperate pleading in her voice. He wondered fleetingly if she would ever be ready to talk about it before saying: "All right. I'll get David and Ace settled and call Colonel Lamb to tell him the lost sheep have arrived safely. No pun intended," he added lightly.

"He'll be relieved," Tegan replied, ignoring her husband's attempt at humor. "Aren't Harry and Sarah Jane supposed to be here on Monday?"

The Doctor nodded, although he was well aware that she already knew they were coming, since their friends always came for a week-long visit at this time of year ("to see how badly you've mucked up the place," Harry always said), but he also knew when she was deliberately changing the subject. "Yes. In the afternoon, I think they said."

Tegan crossed to the antique wardrobe opposite the bed. "I'd best get things ready. I'll set up the fold-out bed in the den for Ace, and get the spare room made up for them. David can share Jason's room for now." She opened the doors of the wardrobe and began rummaging for sheets and blankets.

The Doctor regarded her back for a moment, then shook his head in defeat. When Tegan said she didn't want to talk, she meant it; all he'd get out of her now would be similar trivialities. "Right; I'll be in my study if anyone needs me." He waited for her nod of acknowledgment, then walked out of the room. She'd avoided talking about this situation for too many years now, and it was just as much his fault for letting her try to forget; the panic in her eyes at the mere mention of his leaving pained him so much that he'd left off discussing the possibility of the TARDIS' return in her presence.

Had he been coddling her too much? The troubled look in his eyes remained as he closed the bedroom door and headed for his study, the question unanswered. _Soon,_ he decided abruptly. _We've already avoided this discussion for far too long. It'll have to be soon. _His study door shut behind him with a bang.

>>>

Tegan waited until she heard the door close before allowing her knees to give way. She'd always dreaded the day David and Ace returned, knowing full well that, although her husband meant it when he said he wouldn't leave her, one day the siren call of the space/time continuum would become too strong for him to resist. Sooner or later, he would leave. And that same restlessness that made the Time Lord who he was, that made him the man she loved, was a part of Jason's soul as well. Her son could hardly wait for the time machine to return, could hardly wait for the day his father opened the doors and took him off on wondrous adventures through space and time.

She lifted her hands to scrub wearily at her eyes. Tears were waiting behind those eyes, tears she stubbornly refused to allow to fall. She knew very well that Jason and his father spent hours discussing things they knew she didn't want to hear, no matter how they tried to pretend they were talking of ordinary things, out of deference to her feelings. But she always knew, could tell by the excited flush on Jason's cheeks and the sparkle in her husband's eyes, when they'd been discussing the TARDIS.

The tears threatened to spill over again as she laid her cheek on her arm. She was desperately afraid of losing her son, but even more afraid of losing the only man she'd ever truly loved. Dr. John Smith.

That name had been his alias during his original enforced stay on Earth, an identity UNIT had been more than happy to return to him for the past 16 years. And it was the name she used with him, now; David and Ace's unexpected appearance on her doorstep had shocked her back into calling him "The Doctor" for the first time in years. Had shocked her back into thinking about things she'd much rather forget, things she hadn't allowed in her mind since the months before their quiet wedding ceremony. The memory of those days had grown dusty with disuse, but it was amazing how clear it was today, now that Ace and David had forced her into a spring cleaning of the mind...


	4. Flashback

"I've decided to take UNIT up on their offer."

Tegan paused on her way downstairs, hesitating with one hand on the banister, her sleeping son cradled against the opposite shoulder. "Going back to being Dr. John Smith?" she asked, her tone light but her shoulders suddenly tense.

The Doctor nodded, then realized she couldn't see him, standing behind her at the top of the stairs. "Yes."

"Then you'll be leaving soon." The words were flat, emotionless, but the tension remained. The Doctor stepped closer to where she stood on the top step, reached tentatively to touch her arm. She turned, finally, and he could see the panic she was fighting to control in her eyes.

Ace, David, and not incidentally the TARDIS had been missing for over a month now. During that time, the Doctor and Tegan had remained at Harry and Sarah Jane Sullivan's house, partly in case David and Ace reappeared, partly because the two time travelers had no place else to go, but mostly so Harry could continue to keep a medical eye on Jason. Tegan's parents had been contacted, their frantic worry about their daughter's continued absence after her supposed "holiday" proof that Dracula had kept his word and was no longer influencing them, given a spurious story, and promised a visit as soon as possible. Tegan hadn't told them about the baby. She wasn't sure she could _ever_ tell them about the baby, or anything approaching the truth. She hated lying to them, but knew they would never understand. She hadn't been blessed with very understanding relatives, she'd confessed to Sarah Jane the day of the phone call; her grandfather was the only one she might be able to trust with the truth, but not right away. Not until Tegan knew what she was going to do, not only with herself but with Jason. And the Doctor.

Now, a month later, she still didn't know. Oh, about Jason, yes. She loved her son unconditionally, never mind the issues with his parentage. There was never any doubt in her mind about giving him up–and who would she give him up to, anyway? UNIT? Not bloodly likely. But she didn't know what to tell her family, she didn't know where she was going, she didn't know anything. Anything except the fact that she had a healthy month-old son with a double-circulatory system that would be very difficult to explain to any doctor not connected with UNIT--and even then, she doubted if she'd find it easy to explain anything to any doctor other than Harry Sullivan.

Harry had turned out to be nothing less than a godsend. He'd accepted the Doctor's explanations without so much as blinking or, more important to Tegan, showing disapproval or disbelief. He'd accepted everything, from the existence of vampires and witches to the baby's complicated genealogy. Tegan had been nervous about letting the Doctor tell his former traveling companion the truth, but had to concede the necessity, if only for medical reasons. If there was anything wrong with Jason, anything at all, or if anything happened in the future because of his unique genetic heritage, Harry needed to have the facts. All the facts.

Tegan had been even more nervous at the presence of Dr. Sullivan's wife, but found herself accepting the other woman even quicker than she had Harry, relaxing as Sarah Jane showed the same sympathy and understanding as her husband. Part of it was shared contact with the Doctor, part of it was the fact the two women had met once before under equally bizarre circumstances at the Tomb of Rassilon, but there was more to it than that. Tegan found herself not only liking the Sullivans, but trusting them as well.

Sarah was the only person Tegan felt able to talk to about her feelings for the Doctor. Although those feelings were implicit in her current situation, she'd said nothing to him about them, still too uncertain of him, especially since he'd been preoccupied with figuring out why the TARDIS hadn't returned as expected. Besides, she felt too guilty, she'd finally confessed to Sarah Jane that very morning. After all, none of this would have happened if it hadn't been for her.

Sarah had listened to every word, nodding occasionally, saying nothing until Tegan finally ran out of steam. Then, apparently ignoring everything Tegan had just told her, all the reasons and excuses she'd given, Sarah Jane had spoken. Her advice had been simple and straightforward: Tell him. Tell him everything. Don't wait, don't worry, just do it.

Now, Tegan feared she might have waited too long. She knew that Harry had helped the Doctor get back in contact with UNIT, but she hadn't realized how quickly they would move, once they made up their collective minds. She'd told herself she would have plenty of time to reach a decision. So much for that theory.

"Tegan." The Doctor's quiet voice brought her back to the present with a start. They were still standing at the top of the stairs, and Tegan became uncomfortably aware of his hand on her shoulder. "We need to talk."

She nodded and allowed herself to be drawn back up the hall, cuddling her son closer in a protective gesture. The Doctor paused long enough to catch up Jason's basket from the temporary nursery they'd set up in Sarah Jane's office, then ushered Tegan into Harry's study. He closed the door as she perched on the edge of one of the overstuffed chairs by the window and gently transferred her still-sleeping son to the basket. When the baby was comfortably settled on his stomach, she finally turned to face the Doctor.

He was gazing down at the basket, his face unreadable. "I have decided to work for UNIT once again, and yes, that means I'll be doing some traveling, but they've agreed--and Harry and Sarah Jane have agreed–to let me use this house as my base. With a considerable rent being paid to our friends for the inconvenience, of course." Tegan's eyes widened with surprise, but she remained silent as he continued. "I think I've figured out what went wrong with the TARDIS. It must be the recall button I installed; I admit I constructed it in some haste," he added, his tone faintly ironic. "I've gone over the calculations I used as well as I could remember, and I believe I set it ahead by about 15 years. I think it would be best if Ace and David were greeted with familiar faces when they eventually do make their way back."

"What if that's not the problem?" Tegan asked, hating herself for the pathetic note of hope that crept into her voice. "What if your calculations are wrong and they never get back, or get back much later than 15 years?"

"I'll deal with that question when–and if–it arises," the Doctor replied firmly but gently. "I think it's safe to assume that the recall button is the culprit here–that and David," he muttered irritably. "It's almost as bad as when Harry was traveling with me." But there was just the faintest note of doubt in his voice, and Tegan found herself clinging to it, folding it into a private place in her heart. "I think remaining here is the best way to handle the situation. They have laboratory facilities in London that I can use, and still come home for supper. At least until–well. Until."

Tegan looked back at Jason, to hide the surge of irrational hope in her eyes that warred with her doubt. Was the Doctor leading up to something? Something she didn't want to hear? "What's going to happen between now and then?" she asked, unable to stop the question, not sure if he understood it, irrationally unwilling to clarify her meaning.

"We'll just have to wait and see," the Doctor replied lightly, regretting the tone as soon as the words were spoken. Tegan wasn't asking what the world would be like between then and now, she was asking something much more personal.

Her head snapped up, her eyes filled with a mixture of anger and fear and something else that disappeared almost before he saw it. The Doctor watched the swift play of emotions in fascination as her expression visibly hardened into resolve. "That's not what I mean, and you know it. What's going to happen to me? To my baby?" Softly, almost silently: "To us?"

She didn't wait for a response, instead plunged on before her courage failed her. Again. Tell him, Sarah had advised. It was now or never. "Is there even an us to consider? Is there any chance for that at all? Or am I just fooling myself?"

Before he could respond, she rushed on, barely keeping the edge of hysteria under control. "Doctor, I think it's obvious how Dracula managed to...seduce me." He nodded. "Those feelings haven't changed, even though I know now that what happened between us was just fantasy. Wishful thinking. At any rate," she added hastily, "you know how I feel. That I'm in love with you." There. She'd said it, and Tegan felt a curious sense of relief at having finally spoken the words to him–the _real_ him. "But I still don't know how you feel, about me, about...anything." Her eyes flickered briefly to her sleeping son, then back to his.

"Before I answer that, I have a question for you," the Doctor replied. Tegan nodded uncertainly. "Are you so sure that you still love me? I mean, look at me!" His hand swept upward, taking in his altered appearance. "I'm not the same man I was when we traveled together, Tegan. I'm not even the same man I was after you left. I'm two regenerations removed. Granted, the one in the middle was rather short-lived, but that's still two alterations in my basic make-up. Not only physically, but mentally, and even emotionally. You know what that's like, you've seen it happen to me before. I could be very different from the man you fell in love with." He waited, not sure if she would even respond to his blunt words. His necessarily blunt words.

Tegan had already struggled with these very questions, was almost ready for them. Almost. She hesitated for a moment before answering. "Yes, you're different. But the things I love haven't changed. No matter what you look like or what personality quirks you develop, you're still basically the same. You still care what happens to people, you still believe in doing what's right. You're still the cosmic Knight in White Armor, rushing around to slay dragons!" A smile touched her lips and vanished almost before the Doctor saw it.

"That's part of the reason I was afraid to let you know how I felt," Tegan continued quietly. "It seemed to me that you cared too much about the big things, that you couldn't possibly care as deeply for something as...insignificant as one woman's emotions." The Doctor's eyebrow rose at that one, and she hurried to explain before he could protest. "Not that I thought you were ignoring us–any of us–or that you didn't notice our feelings. I just thought you wouldn't let yourself fall in love. Or...pay attention if someone fell in love with you. Because you had so many more important things to worry about. Like saving the universe." She laughed bitterly. "It's ironic, really; the things I loved about you most were the same things that made me positive you'd never be able to fall in love with me. So I left, before I could...embarrass myself."

"Is that what you thought? That I didn't realize how you felt?" Tegan nodded. The Doctor looked down at his hands, then back into her eyes. "Believe it or not, that isn't true, Tegan. The truth is..." He paused, for once uncertain of what he wanted to say next. "The truth is, I did realize. And because of that realization, I was...afraid of you."

He nodded as she raised a hand to her breast in a mute questioning gesture. "Oh yes, I was afraid of you. Afraid of your emotions. Because they might have forced me to examine my own emotions, and that's something I try very hard to avoid. Your leaving was rather a relief; I could continue avoiding my own emotions, because yours were no longer there to remind me that I had any I wasn't comfortable with." Another pause as he searched for the right words. "I could...put you into perspective, once you were gone. I could tell myself it was for the best, and watch you walk away without allowing myself to feel any regret."

He fell silent, then rose to his feet to gaze out the window. "Then we accidentally landed in Brisbane, and everything I'd been so carefully suppressing came back to slap me in the face. The emotions hadn't been conquered, they'd simply made a strategic withdrawal." He turned back to face her. She'd risen to her feet as well, stood quietly waiting by the chair for him to finish. "It wasn't until I realized how Dracula had gained your trust that I finally admitted to myself how I felt, why I was reacting the way I was. That I loved you as well. No matter how many regenerations I was away from my original feelings, they still existed. As they still do."

They stared at each other for a long moment, unmoving. "Where does that leave us now?" Tegan whispered, hands clenched in tight fists by her sides.

The Doctor crossed the room, stopping directly in front of her as his fingers reached hesitantly to brush her cheek. Tegan's eyes closed, then opened again. "I think that it isn't quite so bad that Ace and David managed to lose the TARDIS," he replied, his voice low and husky. "It'll give us some time together." His eyes returned to the basket. "Us, and our son."

"Our son?" Tegan repeated, voice rising in pleased, cautious surprise. The Doctor hadn't said anything about Jason being his son since he first claimed the baby in the hidden caves and tunnels beneath Castle Dracula. Not that he disliked Jason; on the contrary, he seemed quite charmed by the baby, and had surprised not only Tegan, but Sarah Jane and Harry as well, with his easy manner and general knowledge of how to handle an infant. Certainly he knew more about it than Tegan did. Sarah, never shy, had demanded an explanation, and had received at least a partial one in the form of a raised eyebrow and the casual revelation that, "I've helped raise a child before." No other explanation was forthcoming, but Tegan couldn't help wondering about the woman named Susan who had called the Doctor's first incarnation "Grandfather." Very interesting, but not something she had the courage to ask for further details on. Not just yet. Maybe not ever.

No matter what the Doctor's prior experience, Tegan believed he had claimed Jason as his son only to convince Dracula to admit defeat. And to reinforce Tegan's tenuous hold on her own mind, to help strengthen her desire to remain, and to further weaken Mina Harker's equally tenuous grip on reality. Just because the vampire had taken on the Doctor's form, it didn't mean he actually became the Doctor. A Time Lord, yes, with a Gallifreyan's physiology. But not truly the Doctor. Tegan wasn't stupid; she'd figured that out almost immediately. The Doctor had no legitimate claim on her son, or vice versa.

But now, he was denying her reasoning, nodding in reply to her question, no hesitation in his eyes. "_Our_ son. I don't care how he was conceived; as far as I'm concerned, what I told the Count is nothing but the truth. Jason is my son." Tenderly, he added, "I haven't had a family in quite a long time, and I'm finding the idea of it rather attractive."

Tegan smiled tremulously, eyes brimming with unshed tears as she leaned over to plant a soft kiss on his lips. A kiss he returned, just as softly. "So am I," she whispered as he folded her into his embrace. "So am I."

Three months later, Miss Tegan Jovanka and "Dr. John Smith" were married in a private ceremony presided over by the UNIT chaplain in London. They were attended by best man Brigadier Allistair Lethbridge-Stewart (Ret.), Dr. Harry Sullivan, R.N., M.D., and his wife, Sarah Jane Smith-Sullivan standing in as matron of honor, and one very special infant. Harry held his godson, Jason Kyris Smith, in his arms during the brief ceremony. For the record, Jason was not at all impressed by his parent's wedding. He spent most of the time pulling Harry's hair and trying–unsuccessfully–to swallow his own fist. He showed every sign of being a happy, healthy, normal baby boy, one who grew at the normal rate and, if he seemed a bit more intelligent than other children, well, every parent believed that of their offspring.

They never spoke of his parentage again.

>>>

They never spoke of a lot of things again, Tegan thought with a flash of self-directed guilt. Sarah and Harry had complied with Tegan's request that no mention ever be made of Jason's true parentage, had even, under protest, agreed to confirm the slightly altered version of the truth Tegan and the Doctor had created, when Jason inevitably asked. An alteration that had been as much to ease Tegan's mind as it had been to protect Jason. "After all, it would hardly be a kindness if we told Jason the truth; it's not quite the same thing as telling a child they're adopted," had been her argument. "I think he'll have a hard enough time coping with the fact that his father's from another planet, without adding the burden of worrying about the fact that his 'real' father was a vampire." And that, as far as she was concerned, was that. They hadn't brought the subject up again, not even Sarah Jane, whose protests had been the most vehement. Tegan, she had been heard to remark, could out-stubborn her any day of the week.

>>>

"I can't talk about it." Tegan knew she wasn't being honest with her husband when she said that. It wasn't that she couldn't talk, it was that she didn't _want_ to talk. She hadn't wanted to talk then, and she didn't want to talk now. What she wanted was for everything to just be another one of her nightmares, like the ones she'd had during the panic attacks that plagued her during the early years of her marriage. She wanted it all not to be true.

She pounded on the nearest pile of blankets in complete frustration, then hit it again. And again, and again, until suddenly she couldn't stand it any longer. The tears finally fell and she threw her head down on her arms, sobbing like a heartbroken child.

For better or worse, her world had just changed. And God help her, she was going to have to deal with it.


	5. Dealing With It

Top of Form

**Part Two: Dealing With It**

Ace and David stayed out of Tegan's way for the rest of the day, on Jason's advice and their own instincts. She looked way too grim to even approach with an offer of help as she cleaned the house; the three teens simply moved outside–but not into the TARDIS, since the Doctor had rather ostentatiously confiscated Ace's key–in order to avoid her. Dinner was equally strained, with the Doctor trying to make conversation and his wife replying in curt monosyllables, until he finally gave up. Tegan retreated upstairs after dinner, the Doctor following soon after, and the three teenagers spent the evening watching television. Not Jason's choice; if it were up to him, he would have spent the rest of the night as he'd spent the day, quizzing the older teens on their travels on the TARDIS. It took Ace coming out and bluntly saying they needed a chance to catch their breath before he relented, explaining the concept of digital cable and DVDs to his guests with almost as much enthusiasm as he'd questioned them on the workings of the TARDIS.

David was privately relieved to see that some things never changed. There was another Star Trek series and the new car ads were practically the same. "Who says you can't go home again?" he asked rhetorically, taking a noisy sip of his coke–another comforting familiarity–to cover the note of relief in his voice. He didn't want to admit to anyone, especially himself, how disoriented he still felt. Cellular telephones and wireless computer technology and TiVo...it was a lot to take in.

All his doubts came rushing back when he least wanted them to. Here he was, in his own future–it was the year 2000, for crying out loud!–and not only hadn't world ended, it didn't even seem to notice his absence. Because of that he found himself uncomfortably contemplating his sense of identity and his place in the world. If he vanished for sixteen years and things went on just fine without him, what if he vanished forever? Would the world continue placidly along, unaffected by his absence? Would anyone even notice? He suppressed a superstitious shiver and forced his attention back to the television.

Ace, however, noted the look of determined concentration on his face, and correctly deduced the cause of his downswing in mood. Time to lighten things up a bit, she determined, and started hinting delicately to Jason that perhaps his company would be welcome in the morning.

Not long after a well-aged David Letterman finished his monologue, Ace finally managed to get Jason to take the hint that she and David would appreciate some time alone. He headed upstairs with a knowing smirk plastered across his face. Ace shook her head in mock-irritation, then moved to join David on the sofa. "About bloody time," she grumbled.

"He thinks we want to make out," David observed as he threw an arm across Ace's shoulder. She merely rolled her eyes, graciously swallowing a comment on David's ability to state the obvious, then sighed. The euphoria of the day had worn off, and her mind was busy considering the implications of her current situation–and how she could take David's mind off whatever he was brooding about, which was probably the same implications she'd just been contemplating. That was the key difference; she'd been thinking about it, and he'd been worrying about it. Ace knew she wasn't the type to worry overmuch about anything, and she had a feeling that David was the exact opposite. Which would make things very interesting. Very interesting indeed. And speaking of opposites...

"It seems weird, seeing the Professor married," she commented as she reached for the remote and clicked the mute button. Neither of them were paying enough attention to the program for it to make any difference. Besides, they had no idea who any of the guests were, which made it hard to care about the equally unfamiliar products they were hawking.

"Yeah," David agreed. "I mean, it's not like I've known him for a long time or anything, nowhere near as long as you have, but it doesn't seem...in character. You know?" He fell silent again as Ace nodded her understanding. The two of them stared unseeingly at the television as an unfamiliar advertisement for an unfamiliar product pantomimed its way across the screen.

"It's gonna mean some changes around the old box," Ace murmured regretfully. "I never thought the Professor'd go domestic on me."

David turned his eyes to meet hers. "Maybe it's a good thing," he offered. "You said you did a lot of careening around, never staying anywhere for very long, just going from disaster to disaster. Maybe it's better for the Doc to have a home base, you know? I can't really see him settling down and quitting the universe-saving biz for good," he added. "But then, I can't really see Tegan flapping around with him like she used to, either."

"Maybe not her," Ace agreed, "but Jason sure can't wait to get into the TARDIS. I don't think I've ever seen anyone so excited about anything in my life!" She grinned.

"Oh, like you weren't excited the first time you were off Earth," David scoffed. "Don't even try to tell me you're really that blase about traveling through time and space. I don't think I'll ever be."

As the words came out of his mouth, David realized he meant every one of them; no matter what happened, he didn't think he'd ever lose the feeling of magic that came over him when he stepped into the TARDIS. Sixteen unnoticed years gone by or not, he'd done more than any astronaut ever had; he'd actually traveled to the ends of the galaxy, seen the sun and breathed the air of an alien world, all in the company of a man from another planet, one undreamed of by the majority of the denizens of David's home world. If sixteen years of his life was payment for that privilege, he decided suddenly, then it was worth every minute.

Ace regarded him steadily while these thoughts raced through his mind, then slowly shook her head. "I can't believe someone really uses the word 'blase,'" she finally said, her tone light to cover the note of relief her voice held. She was glad David sounded so starry-eyed about traveling in the TARDIS; she'd been half-afraid that this being sixteen years in the future thing would put him off. Put him off traveling with the Doctor, and put him off other things as well. Things that more immediately concerned her.

"I read a lot," David mumbled, his face burning with embarrassment. Ace merely grinned at him once again. The grin slowly faded, to be replaced by a speculative expression. "What? What is it?"

"I was just wondering," Ace replied deliberately, moving her face closer to his, "what it would be like to kiss you when there's no possibility of you mucking up any controls." She picked up the remote with an exaggerated gesture and placed it on the opposite end of the coffee table.

"Only one way to find out," David suggested with a tentative smile. He leaned closer, hesitated, then mumbled, "and you don't have to be sarcastic about it," before his attention was otherwise occupied.

>>>

The next day, as predicted, Tegan put David and Jason to work painting the back stairs while Ace was sent to help the Doctor in the garden. It wasn't until after lunch that they had a reprieve, when Tegan sent the three teens to the shops. She was as stony-faced as she'd been the day before, her words coming in short, machine-gun bursts, but she was a little more civil to Ace and David. Barely, but it was a start.

"Mum's afraid that Dad's gonna leave," Jason explained with a philosophic shrug as they headed down the street to the market. "We don't talk about the TARDIS in front of her, or at least, we didn't used to," he amended. They'd avoided the subject of Jason's mother the night before and had been too busy to discuss it until now; besides, Ace and David weren't certain what to say in front of Jason, especially in light of his father's earlier request. Fortunately, he'd broached the subject first, obliquely apologizing for his mother's less-than-enthusiastic attitude toward his new friends.

"Can you blame her?" Ace asked practically. "I mean, let's face it; she's probably afraid the Professor only married her because of you and being stuck on Earth."

"Yeah, but we could've come back at any time," David argued, shooting Ace a dirty look for her bluntness. "Just because the Doc figured out we'd be back around fifteen years, that doesn't mean he was right. He was off by a year, and he said it might've been more. Or less, even."

Jason shrugged. "But the longer it took, the better Mum felt about it." He frowned. "She could put off dealing with it. Dad and I talked about this a lot," he added by way of explanation as they turned the corner. "He said that when you two showed up, we would need to be understanding, that she'd been through a lot. So what do I do? I yell for her to come see you, like an idiot." He shook his head, this time in self-disgust. "I just got so excited, I forgot."

"I'm sure she'll be all right," Ace said consolingly. "I mean, the Professor–your father–he isn't the type to get hitched just because it's convenient. Your mum has to realize that he won't leave her just because he can. Otherwise, he never would have married her in the first place."

"Yeah, well, try getting her to believe that," Jason muttered gloomily as they entered the market. "I found out from Aunt Sarah that Mum even made him put it in their wedding vows." Ace rolled her eyes at David, who merely shrugged and kept shut while they picked up the items on Tegan's list.

It had been less than two days since the Doctor asked them not to say anything to David about his true origins, and Ace was already finding it a chore. She wasn't the type to keep secrets, and it only made it worse, somehow, that it wasn't bothering David. No matter what else _was_ bothering him, that certainly wasn't it. He'd seemed surprised when she asked him about it, and she'd hurriedly changed the subject, before he asked how she felt about it.

Ace still couldn't figure out what his problem was, which was almost as frustrating as keeping a secret. David's good spirits came and went unpredictably, although she could tell he was making an effort to hide his mood swings. Ace wasn't sure if it was working on the others, but it certainly wasn't working on her. She'd originally thought it had something to do with being in their own future, but was now convinced it was because of something else entirely. What that "something else" could be however, was anyone's guess. She just hoped he could work through it on his own, since he obviously wasn't about to ask for help figuring it out.

_Hurry up and get over it, Davey_, she willed him silently. _Otherwise we'll never figure out where we stand._

_>>>_

David was silent and moody the rest of the walk home. Jason gave up trying to talk to him and concentrated on Ace, bombarding her with more questions about traveling with the Doctor until they reached the house. He paused in mid-sentence as he realized that David had stopped on the front steps, showing no signs of continuing into the house. After a moment, the younger boy shrugged and opened the door. "Think I'll head for my room. After I dump this stuff in the kitchen," he added. "You coming?"

Ace hesitated, then touched David's shoulder and raised her eyebrows enquiringly. He shook his head and tried a reassuring smile. It was a dismal failure. "I just want to sit out here and think for a while, if that's OK with you," he said.

Ace nodded and followed Jason into the house, content to leave David to whatever his thoughts might be. "Right. I guess I'll see if the professor needs any more help," was all she said as she closed the front door.

"Where's David?" Tegan asked as Jason and Ace walked into the kitchen. "Did you get everything?"

Jason nodded and put the bag on the table. "Everything on the list," he announced. "David's sulking on the front stoop."

Tegan paused with her arms half-way into the bag. "Sulking?"

Ace made a face at Jason, who made one right back at her. "Not really sulking," the younger woman corrected. "I'd call it...thinking."

Jason shook his head. "I know sulking when I see it," he insisted as he started pulling things out of the bag and stacking them in random piles on the table. "And he's definitely sulking."

"About what?" Tegan asked warily. She had a sinking feeling she knew the answer to that; after all, she hadn't exactly been a good hostess since David and Ace's unexpected arrival, although her behaviour didn't seem to bother Ace. However, Tegan suspected there was very little short of a major disaster that would shake that girl. "Did he say?"

"No, he just said he wanted to think," Ace replied. "So we let him. Is there anything you need help with?" she asked, trying to distract Tegan. Because it was obvious that the older woman was disturbed at the thought of David sulking, even seemed to feel a little guilty. Although her stiffness around the two newcomers was still evident, Ace didn't take it personally, and assumed David didn't either. "I'm not the best in the kitchen, but I know my way around."

Tegan shook her head distractedly. "No, that's all right. Why don't you and Jason go watch the telly or something? I'll take care of this."

Jason wasted no time in taking her up on that offer. "Be in the parlor, mum," he said, grinning at Ace. "You coming?"

"I guess," Ace said, her eyes turning once more toward the front door before she followed Jason out of the kitchen.

Tegan watched them go, then her eyes, like Ace's, turned toward the front door. David was outside, alone for the first time since his arrival sixteen years into his own future. Another companion swept up into events almost beyond human comprehension. If that was why he'd been so moody since his arrival, then Tegan could certainly sympathize. And if her own behaviour was contributing to his problems, then it was time and past time for her to mend fences. No matter her feelings about the arrival of the TARDIS, her mental state was hardly the fault of the time machine's passengers. After all, they had risked their lives to save hers. Especially Ace, who had been bitten by the Count. In spite of that, she seemed fairly self-reliant, if not positively resilient; being in her own future hadn't seemed to bother her in the least, and Tegan could tell from her husband's behaviour toward his former traveling companion that he took that lack of concern at face value. Which meant, in Tegan's opinion, that it wasn't simply a brave front. Ace truly didn't mind; the universe had bounced her around enough in her short life that she had learned to deal with it quite well, thank you, and would no doubt resent any attempts at coddling her psyche.

David, on the other hand, was a different story, and it didn't take subtle clues from her husband's behaviour to tell her that; it would be obvious to even the most casual observer. Which, Tegan knew, she was not. Not casual, and not impartial, and not even, no matter how she loathed to admit it, very fair. Which brought her back to her original thought; now was the perfect time to talk to David, to apologize for her coolness, if that was required, and perhaps to offer a sympathetic–and completely understanding–ear. With a firm nod, Tegan abandoned the groceries to the table and headed for the front door.

David was sitting on the top of the stoop. Tegan practically stumbled over him as she stepped out, not expecting him to be quite so close. The two of them traded awkward apologies, then David shifted over a little, expecting the Doctor's wife to continue on her way to wherever it was she was going. To his surprise, she settled in next to him, not saying anything, just studying the street in front of her house much as he had been doing.

"So," Tegan said after a silent moment had passed. "Have I mentioned that I'm glad you and Ace made it back unscathed?"

David shot her a surprised glance. "No offense, but I really didn't get that impression."

Tegan nodded, pursing her lips thoughtfully. "I've never been mad at you two for disappearing, and I'm not unhappy with your return, never have been; it's more what your return represented that's been making me edgy. Believe it or not, I'm relieved that nothing horrible happened to you, just as relieved as the Doctor is." She drew a deep breath before continuing. "I wanted to tell you I'm sorry if I've given the impression that I wished you hadn't come back, I truly am. I hope you believe me. I just needed a little time to get used to the idea of the TARDIS being back."

David nodded. "I kind of thought it might be something like that." He smiled at her, and she smiled back, relieved. "Actually, it was our own fault that we lost those sixteen years, and we were a shock for you."

"You sound as if missing those sixteen years isn't bothering you," Tegan said, surprised by the calm in David's voice. She'd expected that her own behaviour combined with a sense of temporal dislocation had been the root of David's melancholy feelings. "So if that isn't bothering you and my bad manners aren't bothering you–"

"Then what is?" David finished for her when she came to an awkward stop.

"I'm sorry, I seem to have put my foot in it again," Tegan said, chagrined by her thoughtlessness. "I shouldn't have pried, it's none of my business..."

"No, but I don't mind talking about it," David interrupted. He looked surprised, as if that hadn't been what he meant to say. "What's bothering me is the fact that my own father disowned me, and I don't just mean recently, either." His voice was even but his eyes showed every emotion those words cost him–anger, hurt, confusion, everything he'd been struggling to control over the past two days came boiling out in a rush of words. Feelings he'd been unable to express to the Doctor or Ace seemed to come naturally while he talked to Tegan.

"He did it when my mother died, when I was ten," he continued. "He wasn't ever the real friendly, lovey-dovey type of dad, but he was OK until then. When Mom died, though, he changed, got colder. Suddenly I was a burden, and he shipped me off to my grandfather, my mom's Dad. I was just lucky that Grampa Stef was willing to take me, and that he loved me as much as my Mom did." He swiped angrily at a tear that was attempting to make its way down one cheek. "That's what's really bothering me. I mean, yeah, it's bad that I'm sixteen years into my own future, but I can deal with that. It's you and the Doctor and Jason that I'm having such a hard time dealing with right now." He took a ragged breath. "I guess I'm just...jealous. Ace and I are outsiders, we're in the way."

Tegan sighed. "I certainly didn't help any by making you feel as if you were some sort of intruders, did I," she murmured wryly. "I'm sorry I made you feel unwelcome, doubly so now that I've managed to wake up and realize that I'm not the only one with problems."

David managed a wobbly smile as he plopped his chin onto one hand. "I guess we all need time to adjust, like you said." The smile steadied as he turned to face her again. "Thanks for listening; I actually feel better now."

"I'm glad." Tegan smiled back. Now that she had adjusted her thinking and was finally seeing David–and Ace–as more than mere harbingers of change, she realized that she liked the boy, that she cared about his feelings. She wanted the same thing for him that she wanted for herself and for Jason–a chance to be happy, to feel as if he belonged somewhere. And if that somewhere was here, in her house, then so be it. Change wasn't always bad, although it had taken her a long time to realize that.

"It doesn't help that we're practically in each other's laps all the time," David was saying while her mind wandered. "But I've been thinking about that, too. The Doctor–I mean, John–he said he might be able to get me into the university, to finish up my botany studies. If he can do it, that would be great. He said he'd work something out for Ace, too. That would really help a lot, if I had something else to focus on."

Tegan nodded thoughtfully. "Something else to focus on," she murmured. "That's a good way of looking at it."

David nodded. "You know what else?" Tegan shook her head, and David continued, his voice filled with determination. "I'm going to change my name. Back to Mom's maiden name, Van Helsing. Grampa Stef wanted me to, but I didn't think Dad would go for it." He grinned ruefully. "Not that I really cared, but it seemed like such a hokey name, you know? I thought I'd get teased about it. But now that I know it wasn't just a bunch of bullsh–" He flushed with embarrassment as he realized what he was saying. "I'm sorry, Tegan, I didn't mean–"

Tegan shook her head, reaching over to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Don't apologize, David. I know you didn't mean to hurt me. But," her eyes grew distant, "perhaps it's time people stopped treating me like a china figurine–and perhaps it's time I stopped letting myself be treated that way." She rose to her feet and gazed down at him steadily. "Thank you, David."

He stared up at her in confusion. "For what?"

"For making me think," was her reply as she turned and walked into the house.


	6. Resolution

Jason and Ace joined David just in time to greet Harry and Sarah Jane Sullivan a little later that afternoon. Forewarned by a hastily whispered conference on the front steps, the newcomers entered the house ahead of the three teenagers. It only took one look at Tegan for Sarah Jane to come to a decision. "Why don't you give Tegan some help and finish dinner, Harry," the reporter suggested in a no-nonsense tone as she pushed her protesting friend into the front parlor. "Tegan and I need to have a little chat. Dig John–the Doctor–out of his study to help, won't you?"

Harry nodded meekly at the request–more like an order, David thought–then stuck his tongue out at his wife's back before herding the three youngsters into the kitchen. "Come on, let's get going," he said with a good-natured grin. "I've learned not to argue with Sarah Jane when she gets that tone of voice." He glanced over at David and Ace sympathetically. "I imagine you've had a rough go of it."

"You know how it is, never a dull day when the TARDIS is involved," Ace quipped. "Tegan's all right, she'll get over us being back."

"Hmm, yes, well, that remains to be seen," Harry murmured, then turned to David. "I understand this was your first jaunt with the Doctor. What do think of life with the Time Lords so far?"

David grimaced as Harry busied himself with the meal Tegan had already started to prepare. "Nothing I could ever have imagined," he admitted. "How was it when you were on the TARDIS?"

Harry didn't immediately reply. "Hmm, stew, that's a good idea with so many mouths to feed tonight. Hand me that big bowl, would you Jason?" After getting the salad mixed to his satisfaction, he returned his attention to David's question. A question all three teens seemed extremely interested in hearing answered. "My time on the TARDIS," Harry mused. "Hasn't the Doctor ever told you?"

"Not a word," Jason interrupted. "And you never talk about it, except when Aunt Sarah teases you into it. But she never really says anything, either. Not about what it was like, just about things that happened."

"That's probably because it's not the easiest question to answer," Harry replied, leaning over to stir the stew, taking an experimental nibble and nodding approvingly. "I would have to say the best word to describe my time on the TARDIS would be...giddy."

"Giddy?" Ace repeated doubtfully.

Harry nodded. "Giddy. I was giddy with excitement no matter how dangerous things got, and that was my biggest problem. I couldn't get past the fact that I was traveling through space and time, treated it too much as if I were in a movie instead of real life. Which is why the Doctor spent a great deal of time thinking I was an idiot," he added matter-of-factly. "Can't say as I blame him."

Jason seemed as surprised by this revelation as the other two. "That's how I think he feels about me," David blurted out, even as Jason asked, "Dad thinks you're an idiot?"

"_Thought_," Harry corrected, offering Jason a half-smile. "He _thought_ I was an idiot when I traveled on the TARDIS, with good reason. Fortunately for me, he also realized I was a good physician with a good head on my shoulders, at least once I was back on Earth." He turned a sympathetic eye on David. "And no, David, he doesn't think you're an idiot. A bit accident-prone, yes, but not an idiot."

"I guess he told you about that," David murmured, chagrined. Ace squeezed his shoulder sympathetically.

"What does he think about me?" she asked, tossing a tomato into the air and catching it deftly in one hand. Without looking.

"He thinks you need a steadying influence," Harry shot back. "He thinks being back on Earth will be good for you, too." Ace stuck her tongue out at him. He ignored her as he glanced around the kitchen. "How did I get stuck playing twenty questions with you lot?" he asked the ceiling with a good-natured chuckle. "Where's the Doctor for all this?"

"Weren't you supposed to get him?" Jason asked with a grin of his own.

The tall, curly-haired man shook his head firmly. "No. Well, yes, I was, but I'm not. I make it a rule never to try and advise the Doctor. That's what Sarah Jane really wants me to do; she knows he's as hopeless in the kitchen as she is. I'll leave the advising to her. Tegan is just as stubborn as your father, but she generally listens to Sarah Jane. Me, I intend to stay out of it. And so should you," he added, eyeing Jason sternly.

"Who, me?" Jason asked innocently. "Come on, Uncle Harry, you know I can tell when to keep shut!"

"No, you can't," came the curt reply. David and Ace found themselves stifling laughter at the indignant look on Jason's face. "I know you too well, young man; you'll try and use logic to convince your mother she has nothing to worry about. The more reasonable you try to be, the more unreasonable she'll become. Your father still hasn't figured that out, which is why he'll never win an argument with her," he added reflectively. "At any rate, that's between them. I have every faith in their ability to work things out. If you just stay out of it–if we all stay out of it–" he glanced in the direction of the parlor and rolled his eyes expressively– "things will go much better. Understood?"

Jason nodded, not looking entirely convinced. David and Ace exchanged wordless glances, agreeing with their eyes to do what they could to help keep Jason in check.

>>>

Tegan was still quiet at dinner, but her attitude had noticeably thawed from the day before or even, the Doctor noted, from that morning. He attributed it to Sarah Jane's influence; even when he was unable to get through to his wife, her best girlfriend on Earth could sometimes work small miracles. David, too, seemed in a better mood, and the Doctor sensed it wasn't just a temporary upswing. Whatever had been gnawing at David, he appeared to have gotten over it. Neither Jason nor Ace seemed affected by the air of tension, which didn't really surprise him; he just hoped they would continue to be impervious to any fall-out from the conversation he knew he would be having with Tegan later that evening. It would be nice if there weren't any fall-out at all, but he had some very serious doubts about that. Sarah Jane and small miracles would only go so far where Tegan was concerned; his wife had always been very determined, and when she made her mind up about something, it was difficult to change it. But the softening he sensed in her this evening gave him hope.

Once the dishes had been cleared and the washing-up completed, Sarah Jane performed another small miracle as she expertly herded the three youngsters and her husband out back, to "take another look at the TARDIS." They went willingly, all of them fully aware of the real reason she wanted them out of the house.

Once they were gone, Tegan turned to face her husband, eyes and voice neutral but her body taut with a return of her previous tension. "I have to fold the towels." She jerked her chin toward the stairs. "They're in the bedroom."

"Perhaps I should help," the Doctor replied mildly. Tegan nodded and headed up the front stairs, not looking to see whether he followed or not. Whatever else Sarah Jane had said to his wife, she'd at least managed to get her to agree to speak with him. He braced himself for battle, wincing mentally at the imagery he'd conjured up, however true it might turn out to be. He'd have to watch his words, tread very carefully. Tegan could be very good at twisting the meaning of things when she wanted to.

They arrived at their room. The Doctor glanced over at the bed involuntarily while Tegan retreated to the window seat and picked up a towel from the laundry basket resting there. They'd shared that bed, as they had for the past sixteen years, only they'd shared it the past few nights in absolute, unbreakable silence. Each night had been the same; Tegan went to bed before him, deliberately earlier than usual, and he could tell she was only pretending to be asleep when he joined her, but he didn't push it. He'd merely leaned over, kissed her cheek, then turned off the light and slid under the covers. He knew they'd both lain awake for a long time before sleep finally claimed them.

Now, it seemed, he might have the chance to talk to her about...well, about everything. Everything they'd been avoiding for so long. During the first years of their marriage it had been to help keep her panic attacks under control. He had no idea how this conversation was going to go, but felt as ready as he was ever going to be. _You've faced Daleks and Sontarans and the Master_, he scolded himself as his eyes lingered on the bed, reluctant to return to the present source of his consternation. _She's only one woman, and she's your wife. Just talk to her; how difficult could it possibly be?_

As his mind rapidly supplied him with several unappetizing responses to that question, Tegan startled him by speaking before he had the chance to so much as open his mouth. "Sarah Jane has informed me in no uncertain terms that I'm behaving like a child." She dropped the towel she'd been mangling rather than folding back into the basket and released her pent-up breath in an exasperated sigh that also served to expel some of her tension. "She has also informed me that I've been behaving like a child for the past sixteen years, and that it's high time I grew up and faced facts, that she now regrets letting me bury the past as deeply as I have. That," she added wryly, "is what Sarah Jane calls 'breaking a few things to me gently.'"

The Doctor smiled tentatively as he sat on the edge of the bed. "That's Sarah Jane, all right. All the subtlety of a bull in a china shop."

Tegan's answering smile was as fleeting as a glimpse of sun during a London spring, but as warming. "She also informed me that I was crazy to think you'd just up and leave, simply because you could. That I was going to cause the very thing I'm most afraid of and drive you and Jason away by becoming too suspicious and hysterical."

The Doctor cleared his throat uncomfortably. "I don't think I would have put it quite that way–" he began, only to be interrupted by Tegan.

"No, you wouldn't," she agreed, turning abruptly to look out the window. She gazed down at the group of people standing around the TARDIS. Jason's eyes met hers for a moment before he deliberately turned away to say something to Ace. Tegan leaned her forehead against the window with a sigh. "You have a little more subtlety than Sarah. And more understanding than I do." She could sense the effort of will it took for him not to respond to that comment, and smiled briefly to herself before speaking once again. "Go ahead; say your piece. You're practically bursting with it," she added with something of her normal humor.

"Tegan, when I make a promise, I keep it. I don't make them for the mere sake of convenience," her husband began. He didn't bother to hide the hurt in his voice as he continued: "I know you've always been afraid that one day Jason and I would leave you, but you have to believe that the promise I made when we were married still stands. I took those vows very seriously. I still do."

Tegan swiped irritably at a tear that was trying to make its way down her cheek. "I know what you promised," she snapped, her voice harsh with the effort to contain the rest of the tears she felt welling up. There was a brief pause before she whispered, "But I'm not going to keep you to it."

The Doctor went very still; he knew how much those quiet words cost his wife. A long heartbeat of a moment passed before he moved to stand directly behind her. "Tegan," he said softly, carefully. "What are you saying?"

"What it sounds like I'm saying," she replied, eyes still glued to Jason. "Look at him; he can hardly wait for you to open that thing up for you to take him on a trip. We both know letting him explore it won't do forever. He thinks it's all a grand adventure out there." There was an edge to her voice now, but he let her continue; it would do her good to let everything out that she'd been bottling up. "Even though we told him about Daleks and the Master, about Traken being destroyed and Adric dying, he still doesn't understand how frightening it can be." A second tear escaped the prison of her eyes; this time, the Doctor reached around to wipe it gently away. "I've given this a lot of thought. I want to keep him safe, but Earth is hardly a garden of Eden. I'd have to be the most selfish, clinging mother in the world to deny him his heritage. And to deny you your freedom. I know it seems as if that was what I was doing," she sighed, "but it wasn't, not really. All it really ever was about was self-preservation. A way to keep my sanity."

"I had no idea you'd been feeling this way," the Doctor replied wonderingly. And he hadn't. He knew the thought of his leaving again on the TARDIS–no matter how long or short a trip it might be, no matter what the reason–scared her senseless.He also knew that she was deathly afraid of Jason following in his father's footsteps. But her fears about denying them their freedom were a revelation. He wasn't even sure she'd been aware that the promise she'd extracted from him could be looked at in that manner, if one chose to be uncharitable. "It wasn't how I felt," he added. In case she was worried.

"I know. And I haven't been, not in any conscious way. Not until Ace and David showed up–-and Sarah Jane told me what an ass I've been," Tegan admitted. "That probably still wouldn't have been enough, except for the little talk David and I had earlier. He didn't mean to, but he reminded me that I've been very lucky, that there are other people out there who've suffered more than I have. That's what really set me thinking. And one of the things I've been thinking about is what I did when you realized it would be fifteen years before the TARDIS would reappear," Tegan admitted guiltily, "I took advantage to make you promise not to leave me again." She finally turned around, meeting his eyes honestly. _No more hiding_, that look seemed to say.

The Doctor raised an eyebrow and would have spoken if not for the silencing finger she placed over his lips. "I knew that it would only be a matter of time before you gave in to the urge to travel again, even if only for little while. Especially with Jason begging you to take him on a trip. It's taken me a long time, but I finally admitted to myself that I couldn't hold you to that promise. So please don't try to talk me out of it, because you'll bloody well succeed. I don't like the idea of my son out there," she gestured vaguely toward the sky, "or the idea of waiting here for you two to get back. But I can't do it anymore. No more TARDIS trips for me. Just try to be home in time for supper, right?"

The Doctor kissed the top of her head. "I promise. And in case I haven't mentioned it lately," he added, "I love you. That hasn't changed and never will."

"I love you too," Tegan replied, allowing him to pull her close in his embrace for a lingering kiss. She was the first to break it off as she turned back to face the window again. "Maybe it's just as well that Sarah Jane's not the most subtle person in the world," she mused. "She's right; you've all been tip-toeing around me for so long, I got spoiled. I didn't have to think about things I didn't want to think about." She glanced at him over her shoulder. "Well, she helped open my eyes, her and David and Ace. Made me take a good, long look at myself." Another painful smile. "That's not easy to do; a person doesn't always like what they see in a mirror."

"I never wanted to hurt you," her husband said softly, placing a hesitant hand on her shoulder. She reached up to clasp it in her own, leaning back against him. He snaked his other arm around her waist as they looked out the window together. Ace, Sarah Jane and Jason were holding what looked like a spirited discussion involving a lot of arm waving and gesturing. Harry and David were standing off to one side, watching with interest and occasionally trading amused glances.

"I know," Tegan finally replied. "You've given me more happiness than pain, you and Jason both. But you can't protect me from everything, especially my own feelings. I understand that now. I knew it when we first came here, but I allowed myself to forget, because it was easier. Even then, it was Sarah Jane who convinced me to tell you how I felt. Not that I didn't think you already knew," she added with a faint blush in remembrance of long-ago embarrassment, "given the circumstances and all, but she was right; you needed to hear it from me. Even though I didn't know you in this regeneration," she squeezed his hand, "the man I fell in love with was still there, somewhere. You've proven that I wasn't wrong. I'm glad you still felt the same way about me, for all that it took you two regenerations to admit it!"

The Doctor gave a half-smile. "I believe we've already had this discussion, Tegan. Had it about sixteen years ago, if I remember correctly."

Tegan nodded, flashing another quick smile at him. "I know. A woman just likes to be sure, that's all. I mean, I also seem to recall that you came back into my life accidentally!" The tone was light, but there was still a note of uncertainty underlying the words.

The Doctor squeezed her gently. "When you left, I told myself you were better off here, safe at home, than traipsing about the universe with an old man who didn't know enough to mind his own business. And yes, coming to Brisbane was an accident. But when Ace and I found ourselves there, everything I'd been denying, all the feelings I'd kept buried inside, came to the surface. Even then," he confessed, "I probably would have left without going to see you, because I still felt that my presence would only cause you more pain–and vice versa. In a way, it was Count Dracula who brought us together. I must remember to thank him someday."

"We should have sent him a wedding announcement," Tegan muttered sourly. She took a deep, shuddering breath. "I think I've finally managed to get out from under his shadow. Mostly," she added warningly as she turned to look at him. "But I promise I'll do my best to get all the way out."

"I never ask for nor expect anyone to do more than they can," the Doctor replied seriously. But her words caused faint stirrings of his conscience; he hadn't done all he could do to help her fight her way out of the shadows that haunted her mind–-and soul. Not by a long shot. All he'd done was help her hide within those shadows, shadows that haunted him as much as they did her. She'd shown herself willing to finally face them; he could hardly do any less. He nodded to himself as he made a private resolution, then and there, to do his best, as well.

"I meant what I said about coming home for supper," Tegan was saying while he wandered, lost in the shadows of his own mind. "I don't want Jason coming back thirty years old or married or anything like that, but other than that, take as long as you like–after all, what's the good of being a Time Lord if you can't get back five minutes after you left?" The teasing grin faded and she turned in his embrace. "Keep him safe," she said fiercely, placing her hands on his chest. "Bring him back in one piece, and yourself as well. You hear me?"

He hugged her tightly. "I hear you," the Doctor whispered into her hair. "And I promise you, we'll be back. This is our home, after all." Tegan nodded. He would return to her, the happier for having been able to roam among the stars once again.

>>>

David glanced up at the windows of the house. He could see the silhouettes of Tegan and the Doctor against the soft light, standing close together. He smiled as he turned away, back to Jason's excited chatter and Sarah Jane's accompanying laughter.

His life, like the lives of those around him, had been turned topsy-turvy by the Doctor's presence in it, but he knew he would never trade a single second. None of them would, no matter if they lost a week or six months or even sixteen years. In the short time he'd known the Doctor and his friends, David realized he'd gained another family. These people were his future, and he would take them for as long as he could have them.

Smiling, he threw his arm around Ace's shoulder. No one could take the place of the family that was lost to him, but he could add to that family, add to the memories, and that was enough to make him happy.

That, and the knowledge that life with the Doctor would never be boring.


End file.
